How is Insomnia Treated?

Why a Gentler Approach to Insomnia Might Be Just What You Need

Arie, a 38-year-old father of two, never thought he’d struggle with insomnia. But after a demanding six months of sleepless nights, his search for answers led him to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (CBT-I). At first, he was hopeful. CBT-I promised a structured path to better sleep. Yet, when he tried stimulus control and sleep restriction—the cornerstone techniques of CBT-I—things didn’t improve. In fact, they felt worse.

“It was so rigid and controlling,” Arie shared. “Instead of helping me relax, it made me even more anxious about sleep. I started to dread bedtime.”

Arie’s experience is not uncommon. If you’ve struggled with sleep, you might have wondered, “How is insomnia treated?” While CBT-I is often the first recommendation, it isn’t the only path to finding rest. Let’s break down what CBT-I involves and explore why a gentler, less controlling approach may be just what you need.

CBT-I: The Basics

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (CBT-I) is widely regarded as the gold standard treatment for insomnia in mainstream medicine and psychology. It’s a structured program that addresses the thoughts and behaviors surrounding sleep.

There are two key components of CBT-I:

1. Education: This involves understanding how sleep works. For example, it’s perfectly normal to wake up a few times during the night. Learning this can reduce anxiety about minor sleep disturbances, helping you feel more at ease when they occur.

2. Behavioral Changes: CBT-I introduces strategies to improve sleep, including:

• Sleep Restriction: Limiting the amount of time spent in bed to build a stronger connection between being in bed and feeling sleepy.
• Stimulus Control: Leaving the bed if you can’t sleep and only returning when you’re ready to fall asleep.

For some, like Arie, these strategies can feel like they’re adding pressure rather than alleviating it.

The Challenge with Behavioral Approaches

Arie described how focusing on controlling his sleep felt counterproductive. “It’s like trying to grip a bar of soap,” he said. “The tighter I held on, the more it slipped away.”

That’s the paradox of sleep. It’s a natural, effortless process, yet trying to force it can backfire. While CBT-I works for many, the behavioral components may inadvertently intensify the anxiety and hyper-focus on sleep that often fuels insomnia.

A Gentler, Less Controlling Approach

After a few weeks of trying CBT-I, Arie decided to try something different. Instead of rigidly adhering to schedules and rules, he began focusing on reducing the pressure around sleep.

This gentler approach emphasizes letting go of control and trusting the body’s natural ability to sleep. By stepping back from the constant monitoring of bedtime and wake-up time, Arie discovered something remarkable: his body knew how to sleep—it just needed space to do so.

“I stopped trying to force it,” Arie explained. “Once I let go of all the rules, I started falling asleep without even thinking about it.”

Finding What Works for You

Arie’s journey highlights an important truth: there’s no one-size-fits-all solution to insomnia.

Whether you lean toward CBT-I or a gentler approach, the key is finding a method that helps you feel more at ease with sleep. Some people benefit greatly from the structure of CBT-I, while others find that taking a step back and relaxing their grip on sleep is more helpful.

Whatever journey you take, may it lead to where we all want to be: a place of peaceful sleep and peace of mind.